What to do when your boss makes you feel incompetent ๐ –
Introduction ๐
The saying goes “people don’t leave bad jobs, they leave bad managers” – and it couldn’t be more true.
In day-to-day working life, managers can have a huge impact on your wellbeing and self-esteem – especially if they say things that make you feel incompetent. ๐
It’s very common for managers to make employees feel like their abilities are doubted by doing things such as:
- frequently questioning your decisions โ
- giving unclear instructions
- not recognising your achievements ๐
- highlighting your mistakes without helping you fix them
- comparing you to others โ๏ธ
- constantly micromanaging you
- asking for work that’s impossible to achieve in the given time โ
Today we’re explaining 10 things you should consider doing when your boss makes you feel incompetent.
1. Acknowledge your feelings ๐
Itโs okay to feel upset or frustrated if your boss makes you feel incompetent.
Recognising these emotions is the first step to dealing with them. ๐ฃ
It’s important to acknowledge your feelings if your manager makes you feel incompetent because it helps you understand how the situation is affecting you. ๐ญ
Recognising your emotions allows you to decide whether to talk to your manager, get support, or take action to improve your skills at work. ๐ง
Bottling your feelings up might make them worse, so take a moment to process how youโre feeling. ๐ญ
2. Take a step back ๐
When your manager makes you feel incompetent, it can be helpful to try and look at the situation objectively. ๐
Is your bossโs feedback constructive, or simply unfair criticism?
Taking a step back and looking at the situation objectively helps you avoid reacting based on emotions. ๐ฅ
It allows you to see if there are valid reasons behind your managerโs actions or if itโs a misunderstanding.
By staying calm and thinking clearly, you can figure out the best way to handle the situation, whether thatโs improving your work or having a conversation with your manager.
This approach helps you stay in control and respond more effectively. โ
3. Gather evidence of your achievements ๐
Gathering evidence of your achievements is important because it gives you a clear, factual record of your work and successes. ๐
This can help you feel more confident in your abilities when your manager makes you feel incompetent. ๐
Having proof of your contributions allows you to back up your skills and accomplishments, making it easier to have a constructive conversation with your manager if needed. ๐ฌ
It also helps you see your own progress and reminds you of your value in the workplace. โจ
4. Seek feedback from others ๐ฌ
Seeking feedback from others can be useful when your manager makes you feel incompetent, because it helps to give you a broader perspective on your performance. ๐
Hearing feedback from other people helps you understand if the issue is specific to your managerโs view or if there are areas where you genuinely need improvement. ๐
Feedback from colleagues or other managers can also boost your confidence by reminding you of your strengths. ๐
It also gives you constructive advice to help you get better at work, making it easier to address any concerns and improve your performance.
5. Talk to your boss directly ๐ฃ๏ธ
If you feel comfortable, talking to your boss directly can be helpful because it allows you to address the issue openly and resolve any misunderstandings. ๐ค
Speaking to your manager gives you a chance to explain how youโre feeling and reassure them of your capability. ๐ช
Having a direct conversation can also show your boss that youโre proactive and willing to improve, and it helps clear the air.
Working through the issues with a discussion with your manager can help to improve your working relationship, and make it easier to communicate with them in the future. โจ
6. Consider professional development ๐จโ๐
Considering professional development can be helpful when your manager makes you feel incompetent, because it helps you to focus on improving your skills and growing in your role. ๐ฉโ๐ซ
If your manager makes you feel incompetent, it might be an opportunity to identify areas where you can build confidence and competence. ๐
By investing in your development, whether through training, courses, or new experiences, you can show your commitment to improvement. ๐
Professional development can help you to feel more capable and prepared, boosting your confidence in the workplace. ๐
7. Focus on your strengths ๐ช
Focusing on your strengths is important when your manager makes you feel incompetent because it helps you remember what youโre good at and boosts your confidence. ๐
When you’re aware of your skills and abilities, it can shift your mindset from doubt to feeling more confident and capable at work. ๐
What am I good at? 25 valuable skills ๐คฉ
Highlighting your strengths also reminds you of the value you bring to the team, which can help counterbalance any negative feelings and motivate you to keep improving in other areas. ๐
8. Consider your options โ๏ธ
If nothing improves and the work environment continues to affect your wellbeing, it might be time to explore new opportunities. ๐
Considering your options is important when your manager makes you feel incompetent because it gives you the chance to decide how to best handle the situation. ๐ง
You could consider things like:
- looking at changing roles at the same workplace
- speaking to the HR department to get some support
- exploring opportunities to work at a different organisation
Weighing your options helps you take control, ensuring you make decisions that protect your well-being and career growth. ๐ฑ
9. Look after your wellbeing ๐
Looking after your wellbeing is important when your manager makes you feel incompetent because negative emotions can affect your mental and physical health. ๐ง
If you don’t take care of yourself, stress and frustration can build up, impacting your mood, motivation, and overall performance at work.
By focusing on your wellbeing, you can stay balanced, reduce stress, and maintain your confidence. ๐
10. Consider taking action against your manager๐
What can you do if you feel mistreated by your employer? ๐
- Consider legal action: If the mistreatment continues and isnโt resolved through other routes, you may want to consult with a solicitor about your legal options..
- Talk to your manager: If you feel comfortable, discuss your concerns directly with your manager to try to resolve the issue.
- Keep a record: Document any incidents of mistreatment, including dates, times, and details, to have a clear record of events.
- Speak to HR: Contact your human resources department to raise your concerns and explore possible solutions. Remember that whilst HR departments usually want to create a positive work environment, the employer is their priority, so they may not always put your needs or interests first when you seek support from them.
- Check your rights: Familiarise yourself with your workplace rights, for example, what your legal rights are related to discrimination, harassment, or unfair treatment.
- Seek support from a union: If youโre a union member, contact them for guidance and support. A union can provide advice, help with negotiations, and even represent you in formal disputes with your employer.
- Look for external advice: If needed, seek advice from organisations such as Citizen’s Advice or ACAS for free, impartial support on workplace issues.
Conclusion ๐
So that’s it!
Facing challenges at work can be tough, but by staying calm, gathering perspective, and taking proactive steps, you can regain your confidence and take control of your career path. ๐ช
When your boss makes you feel incompetent you can:
- Acknowledge your feelings ๐
- Take a step back ๐
- Gather evidence of your achievements ๐
- Seek feedback from others ๐ฌ
- Talk to your boss directly ๐ฃ๏ธ
- Consider professional development ๐จโ๐
- Focus on your strengths ๐ช
- Consider your options โ๏ธ
- Look after your wellbeing ๐
- Consider taking action against your manager๐
Hopefully this article has helped you to understand better what you can do when your boss makes you feel incompetent.
If you know any friends or family members who might benefit from learning about what to do when their boss makes them feel incompetent, share this post with them!
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